300

I saw 300 yesterday, the most sadistic and excessively blood-splattering movie up to date. I'm not really an epic movie fan but it was pretty fun watching. The movie offers a huge satisfying thrill ride with a superb generated cinematography. It is visually captivating and the numerous fighting scenes were amazing. I dropped my jaw watching those flesh-ripping sequence. Every brawl was cleverly choreographed, impressive and creative… and the oracle was just insanely attention-grabbing. Uhhrroooo!!! uhroooooo!!

the last drink of my third college year

As the school year wraps up, every class has its own way of ending it. What we did? The usual household raid, karaoke and non-stop alcohol consumption. Before writing about fun and excitement, I’m sorry for my friend’s lost. Her brother passed away the other day and it was intensely upsetting to learn the story. Life may sometimes be confusing to some but it’s encouraging to carry on when we realize our family’s company during this misery.

Anyway, it’s time to drop all these weighing troubles behind because it’s all about summer and vacation and fuck no more school!!! From rum, gin, beer to tequila fuck it was a party. My friend has a taste for mixing and dude the drinks were all good. We sang, we drank, and we spent the whole night dancing with silliness. I’m conscious that my singing skill is far from Josh Groban nor Michael Buble but I grabbed that mic and sang as shit as I could. As alcohol streams down my body, I was singing surfing USA and summer lovin’ from grease.

I’m aware that I was drunk and it’s that certain hazy feeling is what I look forward to. We were cussing and cursing for no reason. Our conversation was going nowhere for no one was making any sense. You can be foul and stupid afflicting every person near you for you can always have that “sorry I was drunk” apology.

As the night fades we were all literally on the floor wasted, resting and sobering. The morning after, I had the awful consequence of heavy alcohol consumption. I met mr. hangover, the ever deceitful, untrustworthy, and treacherous drinking companion. I was with him for 12 unforgiving hours, killing and pushing me to stay in bed.

hello uncertainty

I write on this blog because I feel like I can be more sincere here. I really don’t care how people see me as they read this kind of self-straining entry. I usually start with a basic thought in my head. Then as I write through sentences things unfurl as the picture gets clearer. Sometimes I write to waste time having no idea that I’ll come up with some personal pressure that I’m not aware of. It surprises me to realize when this personal black cloud rob s me, imposing such uncertain condition. This black cloud permit me to rant as far as I want.

I’m sick of college. The academic bubble, the environment, the expectations, the supposed independence, I’m just tired dealing with it. One thing that makes me even feel worse is the realism that I can’t do anything about it. I need this to stabilize my life. But what if I’m no longer enjoying? Should I give up and swallow my failure then carry on living a corked life? Though I’d want to blame this suffering, but who holds its responsibility?

I remember a number of things that I’m proud of. But I’ve done more stupid things that I still continue doing. I need to dust my trail to avoid falling in the same hole every year. I need to push myself more if I want to pass. But I’m so relaxed in my comfort zone that I keep myself away from cracking.

I need to fix myself. I can’t tell anyone about my cloudy condition. I’ll just get this forced sympathy and cliché advices making me feel even worse and pathetic. I need to resolve this on my own. Perhaps I should withdraw myself from everything, from everyone. I need to push myself away for a while and recognize every ground as a process.

a bittersweet escape

After misshaping my butt from a 10 hour-ride seven years ago, I never thought that I’d be back in Vigan City. Touring the city's preserved Spanish Colonial Houses is like traveling back in 1572. A Calesa ride along the narrow streets imposes such historic charm. We visited a nearby pottery, ate local snacks, browsed over pseudo-antique souvenirs and endlessly took pictures. I had fun getting lost, photographing, and wandering around the narrow cobblestone street.

After Vigan City, we settled in a local beach resort embracing the South China Sea. I indulged in the quiet times, sitting still in a hammock enjoying the sky as it smoothly fades in the dark (as gnats feast over the skinny body). That same night we mindlessly owned the whole stretch of the beach. We had drinks, shared and heard stories drawn from alcohol as time was streaming beyond our awareness.

The day after, I enjoyed bumming around in our hotel room surfing channels with a tray of food on the sidetable. I enjoyed napping and waking up anytime without any worries. That afternoon, we toured further north. We visited few museums, the Paoay Church- a world heritage site, a winery where we had Basi- a local wine made of sugarcane, then stretched down back to Manila.

Everything was just fine and I wish I could prolong this pre-summer getaway. It’s fun getting away from the cycle and wake up without the feeling of paranoia. I’m happy when I forget about school. I’m happy when I forget about responsibilities. I’m tired of the rounds that I’ve been doing. This is somewhat the escape that I need.

I don't want to be a hypocrite but I initially had doubts with this trip thing but now.. I thought it was pretty fun, I had a good time with my friends.