happy holidays

What I hate about Christmas. The merry concept of Christmas has been drilled in our heads that anyone who doesn’t feel happy is a retarded freak. And just last night I’ve decided to be one of the freaks who I think are just keeping it real. There are just certain people with this sentiment who at times can’t force happiness.

There are several reasons why I sometimes hate Christmas. One is that the entire population of the metro squeezes in the malls desperately hunting for more discounted goods. Malls are so dense that midnight still seems to be like 7 in the evening. Then awful traffic becomes our worst enemy during the holidays.

Couple of days ago, I was walking for hours looking for a cab. After a few more walks I hailed an evil and greedy taxi driver. He insisted of charging a few more bucks since it’s Christmas and he needs extra. I was so desperate that I couldn’t resist the demand. I tried to be kind and paid him with a good Christmas spirit. And as I get out, he said thank you and merry christmas! .. what’s merry with that huh?!

Some say that Christmas is the merriest time of the year. Not for me. I think it's an ordinary holiday celebrated with fakeness. Why can’t I be sad on Christmas day if I feel to? Why is everyone required to be happy on Christmas? I hate it.

Nothing can be as stressful as forcing a big grin on your face. You even have to hang around with people you hardly know and they are like expecting a smile back at them. And you’re likely expected to be interested in their tedious stories as they loosen up with a humor that I can’t even stand.

If some would say that I’m a freak for not liking Christmas, I’m good with that. I’m comfortable and perfectly fine and proud to be different. Christmas is not just the season to be jolly as the song suggests. I’m not the son of the Grinch. You see, there are just normal people who even with their efforts just couldn’t push themselves to be happy.

carnival fun

I had this gratifying feeling after spending a long day with some close friends in the city carnival. It was a long night of fun like we were possessed by a happy ghost. Despite a few hassles, we're glad that we pushed it through and we were truly a happy small bunch.

Since we got the remaining weeks of 2007 to relax and unwind, we've earned the license to behave quite badly. We were running around like sick looneys and hardly care. We had this krispy kreme paper sailor hats on, some scraps that we got from a mall and we displayed ourselves around like some retarded navy officers. It's fun to make fun of ourselves and go nuts once in a while. It's crazy and weird but it's our way to escape from the tense pressure of school.

We had the all-access tickets and we started the carnival fun with the ferris wheel. Watching the sunset from the giant wheel did justice to that boring ride. Then, we rode the flipper which was indeed the vertigo ride of death. I was enjoying the first few spins not until my insides almost came out from my mouth later on.

I tried to keep my balance as we get off. I was holding this fake smile for the people waiting in line. But I wasn't tough after all. I started sweating excessively followed by this feverish feeling. I was not feeling great that moment. I sat for a while and tried to keep up with my breathing. After a few minutes of rest, I got up and I was back better.

I guess the highlight of the night would be the intense horror house. We got really scared like kids. It was a pyschological thrill that really freaked us out. We pushed and ran like 5-year-old kids as the classic bloody Mary and some weird zombies were chasing us around. The heart thumping tactics were pretty great. For me it was the classic winner.

I had so much fun last night. I was so happy like there's this inner contentment that you can't stop smiling and laughing like a silly retard. I'm naturally a happy person and what surrounds me adds up to the mood I bring.. such as a company of friends and laughters, which are definitely the source of inexpensive happiness. Well now, I'm starting to feel that Christmas is really getting a little closer and closer.

excuses, excuses

Everyone's getting a little busy. They're minding their own business a little more than usual. Maybe because it's the busiest season of the year. Like everyone is working on their looong list or something. Or maybe people are simply unreliable on some occasions.

I tried to plan a little weekend trip with my friends. I mean every suggestions and considered every commitments they had back then. After a couple of talks we came up with a date though some really couldn't squeeze it in their time.

But what sucks is the last minute cancellation. I heard about the lamest excuse like they weren't allowed and like they have more important stuff to do.. excuses that seem to have no interest with the idea. So I was left last weekend with nothing much to do.

A friend cancelled on me the other day. We're supposed to meet a photographer for a little workshop until it slipped from his head I guess. Well I'm used to it like he cancelled on me for a number of times with the same "other commitment" excuse. It's even a real bummer when you look forward and fix your mindset towards it. The rush of excitement goes through you before the brain stinging last minute cancellation.

We have plans to go to a city carnivale tomorrow night and some friends already cancelled because they're busy, which is so lame and frustrating. So we moved it this thursday. I'm crossing my fingers for this one. I've been stuck home for quite a while now, I need to go out. I mean it this time, this should push through.